Mad Margaret's Birth Stories

Firstborn's Birth

15.5.87

He was certainly born around or on his due date.

I remember waking quite suddenly at 1am with appalling pain in my back. I had never been in labour before so it seemed probable that this was it. I timed the pains and they were coming quickly, every 6 mins or so. As the next 20 minutes passed, they became closer, until they were just 3 minutes apart. The hospital didn't seem too interested, but said I should come in.

I was bitterly disappointed to find that I was hardly dilated. And yet the pains were still very close together and now forming a tightening band across my uterus too. I tried gas and air, but that was ineffective and so I had a jab of pethidine. In retrospect it's easy to see that I over reacted to it, but hindsight is a wonderful thing. I found myself drifting off into another lovely world, without pain, without agony. Unfortunately, I seemed to forget to breathe in this world and it occurred to me that I could happily die and just fade away. I woke with nurses telling me to breathe and gradually I was back in the room and back in that horrible pain.

I have no idea how I managed to get through the gruelling 9 hours or so, but I managed to be ready to push. And push I did. But nothing was happening. Everyone was telling me to push harder, but still the little so and so would not come out. Over an hour of this and the nurses, sensing something was not right, got an obstetrician to take a look. He declared that James was in the posterior position, so his spine was against mine and he probably would not be able to get out without help. At which point, out came the dreaded stirrups and I was given a J cut (don't ask) and a Keillands Rotation. It was the stuff of nightmares and I had no idea that any human could remain conscious through such appalling pain. After the rotation he was pulled out with forceps (as was common practice 25 years ago - nowadays it would be a caesarian). He was a beautiful and perfect, healthy little boy. They took a while to stitch me back together (28 stitches, the gentleman told me) and a very, very long time before I was well again.

Second born's Birth

22.11.89

2 and a half years later....I suppose having had the birth from hell, it was quite a miracle that I would actually want to go through with it again. Nature is rather clever though and it's hard to recall pain. Tom was not a planned baby and I really am not sure how he even happened, but it was such a wonderful thing and I really looked forward to having another child. I share my birthday with my late father and it would have been very special if this little one could be born on the same day. And I did well, 2 days after our birthday (11 days before he was due) he decided to enter this world. So off I went again.

This time it was easier and more natural. The pains started around 9 in the morning and were a bit like period pains. As the morning moved on the midwives popped in and said, yes, labour is going well. The pains became closer and stronger. I had to go upstairs so as not to frighten my toddler. My exhusband lay on the bed while I was on all fours on the floor and sweetly said "Can't you keep the noise down?" He was not the happiest of people that day. I resolved there and then that if I did have more children he would not be my birthing partner.

We arrived at the hospital, with the midwives, and I was given gas and air. But that was all I had as the pain was never very terrible. I remember having a massive contraction as the MW was head down in the business end, which broke my waters, which exploded all over her and the room. Most impressive! After about an hour or so at the hospital out popped a big baby and as the nurse held him up to me with "It's a boy!" I said "My God, he's ugly." She was not amused. He of course turned out to be a gorgeous pudding of a child and is now a handsome young man!

Daughter's Birth

13.2.95

I was still married to my now ex, but things were far from well between us. When I found out I was pregnant again (another miracle conception) it went down like a ton of sick. It was the unhappiest of pregnancies and my dear friend stepped in as birthing partner. Again, I woke with normal mild labour pains and spent the day working them off as best I could. The bigger problem was that my birthing partner was about to go on holiday and I could not get in touch with her at all. After a day of worry, she finally got back to me and agreed to meet me at the hospital.

The birth was not ideal. All was well until the later very protracted and painful stages of labour and yet again I was given Pethidine. This time I just didn't want to breathe and I vividly remember my friend calling me back from death and death seemed so nice. Gradually, I came round, but pushing was just too difficult. I was more tired than I had ever been. The obstetrician came to check on how things were progressing and said that the baby was a Face Presentation - in other words, not the top of the head, but the whole face. I can only imagine how bizarre this must have looked to the MWs, to see a face peeking out!

So back in ruddy stirrups and the forceps were at the ready. And then a contraction to end all contractions and everyone screaming Push PUSH! And lo and behold, out popped a daughter. She was fine and none the worse for her ordeal. I remember being alone with her, in a room to ourselves, and crying happy tears. Finally, a little girl to complete our family.

The Twins Birth

23.2.11

So fast forward a few hundred years and now I'm a mature lady, about to get divorced, with 2 adult sons and a 15 year old daughter. My IVF story is separate to this, but a little background won't go amiss. The husband had to go and go he did. I suppose I thought my life would just carry on merrily as a mum with 3 kids. I was directing a lot of musicals and singing a lot in cabaret, I didn't really need much else. But then I went to see an open air production of Romeo and Juliet and my world turned upside down when I saw a gorgeous man pictured in the programme. I laughingly said "THAT's the man I'm going to marry." And 6 years later, I did. Through friends backstage I got him interested in my productions and apart from a big hiccup when I found out he was 16 years younger than me (I ran a mile), we quickly found a strong and abiding love. We were married in 2009 and I was given away by my dad, who died a day later. My dad didn't get to meet our twins and that's a very sad thing as I know he would have loved them.

And so on to their day of arrival.

I had SPD, insulin controlled diabetes, ranitidine controlled indigestion and probably every other known horrible symptom of pregnancy. I think the only thing I didn't have was Carpel Tunnel Syndrome. I wanted these babies OUT. Our planned caesarian (they were both breech) was due on the Friday and it was the Wednesday morning. I woke and said to my beloved "I really, really don't think I can stand another night of this." At which point my waters broke all over the bed. And I SMILED. Hoo-bloody-ray. They are coming out today! I still didn't think about the momentous event that was about to happen, just that I might be able to walk without crutches, eat without feeling dreadful and stop injecting insulin 3 times a day. I phoned the hospital and they said to come straight in. I was sooooo happy!

Once there things moved quickly. I was put on a monitor and told I was in labour (news to me). A Dr took one look and started mumbling about a natural delivery. NO NO NO I said. But she seemed to ignore me. "I'll just check your notes." And off she went. I said to DH, I cannot do this naturally, not breech. Fortunately, the Dr returned and agreed.

I walked into the operating theatre and confessed to the anaesthetist that I was nervous. He could not have been lovelier. He told me what was happening and what I would feel every step of the way. He painted my back as I sat on the bed and then he asked me to lean forward on the other anaesthetist. I was frightened at the idea of a needle in the spine, but I really didn't feel a thing. After that they laid me down and prepped me. The area was masked off. About now, DH was allowed back in the room and he rightly stayed at the head end.

The anaesthetist told me it would feel as if people were washing up in my tummy and it certainly did. He then asked if we would like a photo taken and gave our camera to the 2nd anaesthetist who stood waiting. And then just out of the blue that unearthly and most wonderful sound. A baby's cry. Our daughter's cry. That tiny thing that had been so silent and so unknown, was speaking to the world.

The camera snapped away. And a second cry, a different voice. Our son. They were busily wrapped up and placed on my chest. I shall always remember the moment my DH held his child for the first time. It was something that I had dreamed of for so long.

--Mad Margaret (talk) 22:28, 28 April 2013 (UTC)